Silver Linings Read online

  Katie ran her finger over the slight depression, a small divot on the edge. When James had first started to tutor her, she’d lowered her head and focused on that slight imperfection. At the time she’d felt overwhelmed. She’d been convinced she’d never understand those mathematical concepts. James could have given up on her, but he didn’t. For weeks, he faithfully met with her until she started to get it.

  “He was patient with me, and kind. After a while he got over being annoyed having to tutor me.”

  “And you were heartless.” Emily’s voice was hard and angry.

  Katie’s head snapped up at the emotion in the other woman. “Not heartless. I had my reasons.”

  Emily’s short laugh was more scoffing.

  Without fully understanding why or how she knew, Katie looked at Emily and said, “Someone you once loved hurt you badly, didn’t he?”

  It all made sense now.

  The attraction between James and Emily had nothing to do with any physical similarities between the two women. What they shared was loss. They had each been forced to give up someone they had once loved.

  Katie knew she’d hit the mark when Emily’s eyes widened as she shook her head. And while she might want to deny it’d happened, she couldn’t. “That was years ago and long forgotten.”

  “High school? College?”

  “College.” She didn’t elaborate.

  Katie could see that Emily struggled to hide the truth and was in no mood to divulge the story. The other woman’s throat worked in an effort to swallow the pain.

  “It’s not so easy to forget, is it?” Katie asked, her voice dropping to a whisper.

  “Like I said, it happened a long time ago.”

  “Time is relative.”

  Emily’s shoulders stiffened, and when she spoke it was with conviction and determination. “I’m marrying James.”

  “Yes, of course. I…believe you’ll make each other happy.”

  Surprise showed in Emily’s face, and Katie understood that, too. “You have nothing to fear from me. James has made his decision.”

  The other woman held her look for a long moment, and then to Katie’s surprise she pulled the chair away from the table and sat down and she motioned for Katie to join her. Once she had, Emily placed her hands in her lap and said, “I need to know why you hurt him.”

  “There’s no need—”

  “Please.”

  Katie swallowed hard and resisted. “It’s in the past. It doesn’t matter any longer.” What a strange and unexpected conversation to be having with James’s fiancée.

  “It matters to me. I need to know.”

  And so Katie told her, doing her best to keep it short and explain what she could. Looking at Emily was difficult, so she focused once more on that small impression in the table, just as she had ten years earlier.

  Emily listened and interrupted only once with a question. When Katie finished, the other woman remained silent.

  “And you?” Katie asked.

  “Me?”

  “Who broke your heart?”

  Emily shook her head. “It doesn’t matter; like we keep reminding each other, it happened a long time ago.”

  “No fair,” Katie protested. “I poured out my story to you; the least you can do is tell me yours.”

  Emily lowered her head and rubbed her hands back and forth. “Jayson’s parents disapproved of me.” She paused and then added, “I wasn’t raised in the same faith as him and his mother in particular insisted that Jayson marry in the church. It was a difficult decision for him because I believe he genuinely loved me. In the end he did what was right.”

  “Right for whom?”

  “For his family and for Jayson. He’s married now to a woman who shares his religion. Last year he mailed me a birthday card and told me his wife was pregnant.”

  Talk about a knife to the heart. “That was a bit insensitive, don’t you think?” Katie asked.

  Emily shook her head. “The truth is I was glad for him. I knew that he felt terrible about what had happened between us, and the hard decision he made to break up with me. He hoped to hear that I was happy, too, in order to ease his conscience. I let him know that I’d fallen in love and was about to be married myself.”

  Katie smiled, though tears filled her eyes.

  Emily frowned and leaning forward, she placed her hand on Katie’s arm. “I’m sorry…what did I say?”

  “No, no, it’s fine…I’m the one who should be sorry.” Embarrassed, Katie smeared the tears across her cheek. “You see, I understand. I so, so understand. You loved your Jayson enough to want him to find happiness. You realized that he never could be with you because there would be this constant pull between his faith, his family, and his love for you.”

  Emily bit into her lower lip. “Yes, I want him to be happy.”

  Katie gripped the other woman’s hands in her own, squeezing her fingers. “Don’t you see? That’s why I can promise that you have nothing to worry about between James and me. I love him enough to want the same for him. Make him happy for me, Emily. Love him for me.”

  Tears shone in Emily’s eyes and she wrapped her arms around Katie’s shoulders and the two of them hugged.

  Footsteps sounded behind them.

  Neither Katie nor Emily broke off their embrace. Their hearts were linked with understanding and shared loss.

  “What’s going on here?”

  Katie didn’t need to turn around to know it was James who’d spoken.

  The minute the music began, Coco started to shake her hips. The Britney Spears song “Do Somethin’ ” brought her right back to when she was eighteen years old. Right away she looked for Hudson.

  Before her courage failed her, Coco sought him out. She found him at a table with Willard (Will, she reminded herself!) and two other former members of the science club, along with their dates.

  As she approached, Hudson caught her look. Before he could hide it, appreciation and desire flashed in his eyes. His look did crazy things to her heart.

  “I would really like to dance with you,” she said.

  He pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose and sighed, as if refusing her demanded more of an effort than he could muster. “Just remember, I gave you fair warning.”

  “You did,” she agreed, but it wasn’t enough to dissuade her.

  “Would you just dance with her?” Will said, elbowing his friend. “A few years back you’d have sold your soul for the opportunity.”

  Hudson sent him a harsh look.

  Coco held out her hand. “Come on, Hudson, show me what you got.”

  His smile was almost boyish as he stood and gripped her fingers with his own. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

  As soon as they reached the dance floor, the Britney Spears song ended and a slow one started.

  “Now we’re really in trouble,” Hudson muttered as he turned her into his arms.

  Coco fit nicely in his embrace and looked up at him and smiled. “This isn’t so bad, now, is it?”

  He grinned and rested his chin on the crown of her head. He did little more than hold her and shuffle his feet a little, and she was content with that. He rubbed her back, and she twisted her chin up just enough to kiss the underside of his jaw. Hudson faltered and although they were barely moving he nearly lost his balance.

  “Sorry.”

  He cleared his throat. “My fault.”

  Coco tilted back her head and smiled up at him. “I’m enjoying myself, and while you might not want to admit it, you are, too.”

  He had his eyes closed and nodded. “I used to dream about dancing with you.” No sooner were the words out of his mouth than he inadvertently stepped on her foot.

  Involuntarily, Coco grimaced.

  Hudson cursed under his breath. “It’s probably best if we don’t talk, okay?”

  “Okay.” They moved nice and slow, swaying gently to the music of the Black Eyed Peas. After a moment, Coco closed her eyes, relishing the
feel of his arms around her. Hudson held her close and she looped her arms around his neck, surprised by how comfortable she felt.

  When she opened her eyes she noticed that Hudson’s concentration was keen, his brow furrowed slightly as he watched his feet.

  Coco pressed her head against his shoulder. Another song played, another slow one, and they barely moved. The music was soothing and romantic. Coco had her eyes closed when Hudson stepped on her foot.

  She released an involuntary yelp. It was something of an accomplishment to trample on her foot when their feet were moving only inches at a time. She might have suspected he’d done it on purpose if not for the flash of irritation that showed on his face.

  “That’s it,” Hudson said, dropping his arms. “I told you earlier that I’m no good at this.”

  “You don’t like dancing with me?” she whispered, looking up at him. She hated the thought of breaking the contact.

  “I like it just fine. Too much, if you must know, but I don’t want you leaving town on crutches.”

  The too much part of his answer made her smile. “Is it warm in here or is it just me?” she asked, fanning her face with her hand.

  Hudson stared down at her.

  “Would you like to go outside and cool off for a bit?” she asked.

  He didn’t answer but continued to stare at her. “It is warm in here,” he conceded, and reached for her hand, holding it firmly in his own as he led the way off the dance floor and out of the gymnasium.

  On their way outside Coco grabbed her purse. Hudson led the way around the building to the football field and then into the stands. He sat down on the concrete bleachers about the third row up. Coco followed him into the row and sat next to him.

  Leaning against his side, her head on his shoulder, she looked into the night sky. The evening was clear and the moon was full, casting a golden glow over the lush green football field. Coco couldn’t have asked for a more romantic setting. The moon, the stars, and one of the biggest surprises of recent memory was sitting right next to her.

  “This is perfect,” she whispered.

  Hudson remained stiff at her side as if he didn’t trust what was happening. Perhaps she was getting ahead of herself—Coco didn’t know. But for that moment, that evening, she wouldn’t have changed a thing.

  “You can put your arm around me if you want,” she said, welcoming his touch.

  “If you’re cold you can put on your sweater.”

  “I’m not cold.”

  “Oh,” he said, still sitting with his back rigid.

  Hudson turned and studied her, his gaze narrowed with what could only be doubt. “You know, you and I are about as different as any two people can get.”

  “Haven’t you ever heard that opposites attract? And might I remind you that you were attracted to me at one time? It just so happens that I find you strongly appealing and I was sort of hoping you felt the same.”

  Hudson seemed to give in and placed his arm around her. She nuzzled closer to him and laid her head on his shoulder again.

  After what seemed like a long minute, he exhaled a deep sigh, the air rushing from his lungs. “Question.”

  “Okay,” she said.

  “Are you playing me?”

  “Playing you?”

  “This isn’t a joke, right? You actually meant what you just said?”

  She nodded, and then, as if to prove her point, she stood and scooted so that she stood directly in front of him.

  Hudson looked up at her, his eyes wide and curious. “What are you doing?”

  Smiling, she leaned down, planted her hands squarely on his shoulders, and then gently pressed her mouth over his. She heard the soft intake of his breath as he wrapped his arms around her waist. The kiss was long and deep. From the moment her mouth touched his, Hudson took control, bringing her down so that she sat on his lap. His mouth devoured hers, stealing her breath away.

  By the time the kiss ended, Coco’s head was swimming. It’d been a very long while since she’d been kissed like that. It took her a moment to compose herself.

  “That was really nice,” she whispered, hardly sounding like herself. He held her close, and she tucked her head against his neck. After a prolonged silence she said, “Hudson?”

  “Yes?”

  “Are you playing me?” Coco felt his smile.

  In response he lifted his hand and turned her face toward his and kissed her again, as if he couldn’t get enough of the taste of her. It was a good thing she was seated, otherwise she was convinced her knees would have given way. His kisses were potent and she felt them all the way from the top of her head to the soles of her feet and back again.

  They were both breathing hard by the time he eased away.

  “You might not be much of a dancer, Hudson Hamilton, but you have other talents.” This man was full of surprises.

  Again she felt his smile. He kissed her neck and shivers raced up and down her arms. Feeling as she did right that minute, Coco didn’t ever want this night to end.

  “I loved your spirit,” Hudson whispered. “You were, then and now, always original. Do you work in fashion?”

  “No.”

  “No?”

  “I started out in fashion but after I graduated from college the only work I could get was part-time at the Seattle Fifth Avenue Theater in costume design. Part-time doesn’t pay the bills.”

  “And now?”

  “I’m a partner in a company that develops apps for cellular and tablet technology.”

  “Phone apps?” He didn’t bother to hide his surprise.

  “Quit asking me so many questions. Just kiss me again, okay?”

  He readily complied until it felt as if her entire body was humming in tune with his.

  “There’s a question you aren’t asking me.”

  Once more he went rigid. “I’m avoiding it.”

  “Why?” she asked.

  “Guess I’m afraid of the answer.”

  Coco kissed the top of his head. “Ask me.”

  “Okay, fine. You’re involved with someone, aren’t you?”

  She let him suffer, but only for a moment. “As a matter of fact, I’m not.”

  “But you were?”

  The way he said it seemed to suggest that he thought she’d recently gone through a breakup and was on the rebound.

  “I’ve dated some.” She hesitated, looking to reassure him and find the best way to describe the last ten years. The truth was since high school she’d felt the need to protect herself and not be vulnerable. Instinctively, she felt she could trust Hudson. “After Ryan, dating became something of a trust issue with me.”

  She felt his body relax.

  “So you’re single?”

  “Yep. What about you? Is there someone important in your life?”

  “Several, actually.”

  “Several?”

  “My brother and his wife have two daughters I’m especially crazy about.”

  Coco playfully slapped his shoulder. “That was mean,” she said, and then promptly kissed him again. “Are there any other relationships I should know about?”

  “No.”

  “That’s good to hear.”

  Hudson Hamilton and her? Coco couldn’t keep from smiling. Drawing in a deep breath to regain her equilibrium, she said, “Okay, you know about me and my apps job. Tell me about you.” Her head was back where it was earlier, tucked against his neck as she snuggled into his embrace.

  “What do you want to know? There really isn’t that much to tell. The thing is, I live a pretty boring life.”

  “I want to know everything.” His earlobe was right there and, unable to resist, she caught it between her teeth and gently sucked on it. His reaction was instantaneous and she felt the response move through his body.

  “Coco!”

  “Sorry.” Only she wasn’t. Teasing him was fun.

  “Maybe it would be best if we went back inside.”

  “No.” Her protest was
immediate. “You were going to tell me what’s been happening with you since graduation.”

  “Okay. I work for the University of Washington in their biotech laboratory. Right now my group is developing breakthrough technologies to complement protein design in nucleic acid and protein sequencing, with a secondary interest in high throughput activity screening.” He continued to speak with animation for several minutes, clearly excited by the research in which he was involved. Most of what he said went completely over Coco’s head, but clearly he was passionate about it.

  After a few minutes, he hesitated. “I went on too long, didn’t I?”

  “No,” she said, and meant it. “What you’re doing is wonderful. It has the potential to save lives, right?”

  “It’s early stages yet, but yes, I hope so. I find my work exhilarating.”

  “I love how excited you are about your work.” It might be a mistake to admit how much she liked being with him, but Coco couldn’t help herself.

  He went quiet.

  “I mean it. I think you’re wonderful.” Coco leaned her head against his shoulder and glanced up at the stars twinkling in the clear night sky.

  “It’s just nostalgia—because of the reunion,” he said, discounting her words.

  “It’s you,” she countered. “And the fact that you were willing to risk life and limb defending me against Ryan…that you’re a trustworthy friend and honest. You didn’t have to admit to Ryan that you were the one who slashed his tires. Everything I’ve learned about you in the last twenty-four hours appeals to me.”

  They sat quietly for a long while, content just to be together.

  “We should probably go back inside,” Hudson suggested, after glancing at his watch.

  If it was up to Coco they would have remained outside for the rest of the evening. But she knew Katie was miserable and wanted to get back to the inn, and her friend would need a shoulder to cry on. She felt for Katie and wanted to be there for her.

  Hudson helped her up and then, holding her hand again, led her back toward the school.

  “Will I see you tomorrow at the picnic?” Coco asked.

  “Sorry, no. I’m heading back to Seattle in the morning.”

  “Oh.” That was a disappointment. “I’ll give you my contact information.”